Week 47 - Building a house...building a family.

After tossing and turning in bed for 2 hours, I finally decided that if I was going to be awake, I better use my time wisely....and attempting to catch up on my sad documenting has haunted me. So here I am.

I am not even particularly sure what to post. Life is kind of at a standstill right now, and yet whirring by like a speeding train. We had an architect draw up plans so we could move forward with building. We have kept our eyes peeled in case a house comes on the market that we love, but so far there has been nothing. We waited 2 whole weeks for the first set of plans. 2 WEEKS! It was like watching water boil...like watching an ice cube melt. It was hard! lol I was SO excited when they first arrived...I just poured over them, starting to catch the vision of our new place.

....and then after looking at them over and over, the excitement wore off and I realized I really wanted something different. We had taken 2 floor plans and pointed out things we liked about both (the architect had designed both homes), and took in a list of things we wanted. By list, I mean 1 page front and back filled with details. But as I looked at the plans, I realized that most of the things on our list weren't there and she had just put her 2 floor plans together and added an extra room and a laundry chute. It is a great layout--don't get me wrong. But after Brandon and I talked, we felt that if we were building a custom home--paying for a custom home--we really want something different than everything out there! I emailed back last night---explained where we were coming from. And now the wait begins again--first, the wait for her to see this email come Monday morning (which I am dreading--she's going to think we are NUTSO!) And then waiting again for the new plans to get put together.

When we started this, I was thinking we would get the ball rolling and start clearing the land and laying the foundation by mid December. Why? I have no clue...it clearly is going to take more time than we thought. We won't be ready for that till well into the new year now, I am sure.

This whole ordeal (ordeal? Situation? Whatever it is...) has me thinking that I am in for a double dose of learning patience...patience with others, patience with myself. Patience with this process.

I was pondering this morning how I can see the comparison to building our family to be good, strong, righteous and raising each child to reach their fullest potential. The older the kids get, the more unique their personalities become. There are days I struggle with how to meet their individual needs, and how to communicate with each one in the way that THEY will respond best. I don't think this is a "mom of 5" problem. I would wager to say this applies whether you have 2 kids or 12. For my perfectionist self, letting go of having things "just so" and embracing individuality is incredibly difficult.  It's not an overnight thing. I can't just blink and have it done. And just like we take our communication the our realtor who takes it to the builder, I find myself just needing so frequently to take this struggle to the Lord. I am just one person. I can throw out my ideas, but the master builder sees the big picture and knows how it will all come together.

And after searching and waiting, I get a plan from the life builder. :) Inspiration. Ideas. And I get to work seeing how it fits. Often, I find that it needs tweaking and change. Sometimes I find I need to start over all together. And it has me going back and desiring once again to have a unique solution for a unique personality. Take this process times 5...the struggle is real! :) And I have yet to find on Pinterest a perfect one size fits all approach for how to raise children.

I hope and pray my kids know that I love them. I often wonder if I am enough. If I am doing enough, saying it enough, showing it enough. I certainly have room to improve...heaven knows that the messes made, the chores half done, the clothes left bunched up on the closet floor, the wrestling and results of said wrestling, and overall childhood drama can set me reeling, despite the absolute best intentions to be calm and peaceful and loving all. the. time. I guess I just hope those moments of frustration don't outweigh the moments of love. This week. That's my goal. More moments of love, less moments of mad.

Just like our house is being approached as a place we will live forever, I see this with my family, who I want to be with forever. We are trying to foresee experiences, life changes, etc and build our house to be able to withstand all those changes and be a great fit for us for many, many years. But in the end, it is just a house. A thing. A temporal place to live while here on earth. But my family, oh my sweet family, it is much the same. Trying to get it right now--to teach them, love them, form bonds with each other and help them grow so that we can endure all the change that comes over time and see each other through to eternity and beyond.

Happy Sunday.

week 46 - Our little master of disaster

I am pretty sure the last 37 pictures on my phone are of Josie. It's not that I love her more--but she is in "that stage"...you know, where things are so cute, and she's learning and exploring, and she makes crazy messes...you know..

Josie had her 18 month checkup. She was 19 pounds--my little bean is growing up!





A few days after her flu shot and other age appropriate shots, she went into a tailspin of grumpiness. Irritable, wouldn't sleep, cried constantly. It was miserable. Jenna wrote a poem about the situation...



 I finally took her to the doctor, wondering if there was a reaction to the shots. Low and behold, she had a bad ear infection. We got some juice, some meds, and a good night of sleep and she seemed to be doing better.

Now her grumpiness is just attributed to her preparations for the terrible terrific twos and an 18 month old sleep regression. But really for the most part, as long as she has snacks, a bottle, or a phone to play with, she's happy as a clam! ;)

Took my girl to Sams this week where she fell in LOOOOVE with the giant stuffed bear. If you own this, I'm sorry. And...WHY!? lol It was sure fun to see in the store though...


My Josie girl also loves to play in the alley behind our house. Because all our homes are rear entry garages, she thinks it's her little play ground. When we get her out of the car, she will often run over to the plasma car and hop on, pushing herself to the edge of the garage where gravity takes over and she races to the bottom of the driveway where she can hop off and make her getaway down the road on foot. She isn't always a runner--but she IS independent and loves to be outside. I think those 2 things cause her to just do whatever it takes to get there!



She also loves to take baths. This is good because...well, we didn't nickname her the master of disaster for no reason...

EXHIBIT A...



(this LITERALLY took only the time it took me to put the milk in the fridge)

EXHIBIT B:



Yogurt. Easy enough, right? All over the table, under the table, in her hair, eyelashes, skin creases under her chin.

EXHIBIT C:



same day as the yogurt...different meal. I'd say it takes talent to get macaroni and cheese to stick to ones eyebrow!

Also added to her many talents--stealing everyone's toothbrushes, unrolling toilet paper, open the toilet lid and "swishing" whatever she is holding in it (iiiiick), throwing her food on the floor when she decides she is finished, emptying her drawers several times a day...emptying MY drawers several times a day, finding writing utensils of every kind and only ever drawing on the important things like: bank paperwork, homework, library books. She is FAST!

We love this little peanut of ours. We may joke about all the destruction she can cause, but she definitely holds a special place in our family! The kids often will hang back and delay leaving for school so they can see her before they are gone. She is the one everyone wants to see before bed. Her laughter is contagious, her smile melts hearts, and she is the most hugged person in the house!

We love our little Josie--the master of disaster and the sweet girl that makes our family complete.

Week 44 - No tricks...just treats

This week was a total blur!

My cousin, Justin, flew in for work, so we grabbed some lunch and chatted a while. It was fun to see family--




The rest of the week was a madhouse trying to get soccer practice and piano, costumes made, meetings attended, etc.My brain was mush. In fact, we were half way to piano when Spencer notified me that Kaden was not in the car...so we had to turn around. How this didn't come up earlier is beyond me...

Anyway, this was the year of the "let's get creative because we aren't buying anything new"...
Carter wanted to be a robo hotdog--which I still remain confused about. After asking and asking and getting no real direction, he took it into his own hands and colored a box--partially spray painted it--and found himself a happy camper.



I did break down a buy a costume--it was a crazy good sale and I bought it Thursday with the promise of free one day shipping and free returns if it didn't work out. I have wanted to go as Snow White for a long time now--so it was serendipitous that it worked out like this...I had some little girl fans who came and hugged me, and it totally made my day. :)





In other costume news...Jenna was an old lady. Kaden was a lego. Josie was a strawberry. And Spencer was Abraham Lincoln. He was pretty proud of his costume...


We got way too much candy, had way too much fun, and wrapped up this Halloween week by heading to bed early in preparation for the time change. :)

It's looking like we will be building a house now, which is scary but exciting. We meet with the architect on Wednesday...eeeeek! So that ball gets rolling this week...unless we just so happen to have a ready built house pop up on the market in the next 3 days. And judging by the places we have seen until now, it's just not looking like that's going to happen. I've never been in such a strange market as Amarillo! There seriously aren't enough houses for sale--it's insane!


Ready for a new week...month...for some change.
Happy Sunday.