So far.

We're having a good time.

Have spent the past several days with Brandon's family and it's been fun to have the cousins running around together and playing.

This week we go back up to my parents for the duration of the trip--I have decided that it's so hard to be on a trip without a car. As much as people want to help out and are WILLING to, I hate feeling like a burden...When we came last time (driving) it was easy to schedule plans and make arrangements to see friends and such, but this time it feels different. I want to see everyone I can--and I hope it turns out that way--but it's definitely not as liberating to have to borrow a car or work around schedules. What's funny is that I even had a dream last night and in this dream my hands were tied up--yet there was so much going on around me--and all of a sudden I saw my mom coming in her car to get me. It was all too real! :)

It's been fun to be with Brandon's family. I am grateful to have good in-laws, who welcome us to stay even if their own son isn't with us. :) They've been good to us, and the kids love seeing them too. Brandon's sister also got to be here with her family, and it's so fun to see her and her family.

As I have reflected on things, I have been reminded just how important family is to us. I am EVER SO GRATEFUL for all my parents have done for us, in even helping this trip to take place, and for the support of so many around us. I feel overwhelmed--and in a sense, there are really truly no words that will ever be able to correctly give the thanks I feel is deserved. I just hope that I can convey those feelings--even if it is a small portion of how I feel.

I have finally figured out how to deal with all my pictures on someone else's computer. THAT alone was super stressful...but hoping I can have some pictures up soon. :) Being without a laptop this time is also something that has left me feeling a tad bit crippled! :)

But we're getting in the groove of things--trying to figure out schedules and such, without looking like the party poopers (since the kids usually go to bed at 7:30)...and I am glad it feels like time is going relatively quickly...

We miss Brandon. lots.

And I just can't wait to be together as a family again. But for now, spending time with our other family is a good place to be...

The lego store and more...

I have a few more little things to post from before the trip. I still cannot express how frustrating it is not to have a computer of my own to put pictures on a post them. HUGE SIGH....of frustration. Hopefully in the next few days I will have something else figured out--but until then, here's a little more pre-Idaho excitement...

Part of our little vacation plan was to spend a day in Columbus before we flew out. While Brandon was at work, we checked out the Lego store together. Can I just say that I never realized how many things can be built with legos?!?! Seriously, fascinating.

May I also say that I never realized that playing with legos is actually something I love to do? I know--crazy! The people we were staying with had legos and the kids and played with them for a long time. It was so much fun! So this place was a great stop for us--except that the kids wanted a little bit of everything... ;)














It was so much fun--

Getting the kids to leave the store without smuggling any small pieces or people, without a stroller, was a different story. :)

Am so excited to see Kaden's face when he sees the little lego kit we got him for his birthday. shhhh!!!

We headed home for naps and then in the evening we met up with Brandon and headed to Red Robin. It's officially birthday season at our house, and we have birthdays for the next several months--and birthdays mean RED ROBIN and our free meal! :) yum! This Red Robin was sooo cool! I had never seen one like it. Seriously impressive!




We ordered our food--we ate our food--and we enjoyed the traditional birthday sundae and singing that make the special day complete!

A little pre-trip catch up!

I realized today that I had posted a few pictures to my flickr account so I would them to blog when I got here. And let's face it, this blog is lacking in the picture department lately. It's rough stuff to not have a computer easily accessible to put my pics on...I feel so crippled without it! It has reminded me in many ways how much we use (AND LOVE) technology!

To celebrate Jenna finishing school we went to the kiddie park with Brandon after he came home for the weekend...and if I may please discourage you from looking too closely at the kids outfits--all the good stuff was packed, and the leftover stuff is what they got to wear! lol











All pretty self-explanatory really. The kids had a great time as always...and it was fun to be together. Jenna braved the roller coaster this year (last year she tried and CRIED so hard) and did a great job--her face at the end of the one round was PRICELESS--huge eyes, pale face, letting out a BIG sigh...but she did it. ;)

We are proud of her for finishing up kindergarten and all she learned this year! :)

Hello Idaho.

it's probably a good thing I didn't blog yesterday...

I was exhausted, overwhelmed, stressed, and irritated.

And this probably would have turned into a major rant about certain rude and inconsiderate passengers on airplanes, the fact that it's RIDICULOUS that southwest airlines no longer preboards families, and how LONG a 4 hour flight really feels when you are flying alone with 3 children--during naptime.

However, today I had a nap...and got a haircut...and dang it, I feel like a new woman. :)

And thankfully I will be here for a month and hopefully able to forget the tears I shed on that Boeing 737 yesterday. :)

Yep--for now I will be thinking about how the kids have played outside almost nonstop since we got here, and how I actually did get to take a nap today while the kids were at the park with grandma, and how fantabulous my hair feels, and about how nice it feels to have the immense amount of stress I have been under lifted--and I am especially thinking about how in less than 2 hours I will be sitting at our favorite Mongolian restaurant eating food I have craved for a year now! :)

It's a good day....in a good place...

First step...

Right now, we are in Columbus--waiting to board a plane tomorrow to take off to Idaho.

It's the first step on making our way home...

We had a busy weekend. LOTS to do to get ready to leave--boy is it exhausting to think of everything you need, and clean everything you should, and leave the house in decent shape. But there was a definite sense of relief to close the door and walk away from everything for a good few weeks.

I am excited to be going home. There is so much I love about Idaho--and Idaho in the summer is no exception. (provided the weather stop snowing...pronto). :) I am so thrilled for the kids to get to see their cousins, sit around the fire pit and roast marshmallows, jump on the trampoline and get good and dirty (and worn out!)...and I am excited to hang out with my sisters and brothers and parents...to play games and eat sno cones and to not be consumed with keeping everything up all by myself.

And my hope, however naive it may be, is that being so busy having fun will help the weeks to fly by so that the time away from Brandon won't be so long. We will miss him...

It's strange to think that when we come back, I will only have 2 weeks until this baby boy makes his appearance. wow...that just doesn't seem possible! :) The name game is still in play--have narrowed it down...but I am test driving it to make sure it's a good fit... ;) Naming babies is SO hard. Why did i think it could be condensed onto an easy little wish list when I was a teenager??

Anyway, rambling now really....just feeling excited to be home tomorrow...and anxious to fly with these kids all alone. Hoping and praying they will be okay (not asking for angels here, but definitely asking for wanna be angels! :)

Signing off from Ohio...

Tonight

Tonight I will be finally relaxing with my husband...watching movies together and laughing and enjoying our time!

I won't be sprawled out in my lonely bed....

Or up with anyone who wakes in the night...

Nope.

And despite the rough couple of weeks it's been, the very thought about this weekend ahead of us makes it all worth it.

The celebrations!

Just a little rundown of the birthday girl's birthday celebrations!

I just had too much going on this year to make Jenna's cake. Trust me, I have felt incredibly guilty over this--cried many tears--and finally just had to settle with the fact that a Hello Kitty cake from Sam's Club would do. She got to take the cupcakes to her class, which won her over during my cake negotiations. :)
After school, Travis and Jenny came over and we had a pizza party and opened presents. Jenna has been asking for a camera forEVER. She has been saving money up, talking about it regularly, etc. So we figured it was REALLY something she would love.

First words out of her mouth upon opening it...

Now I just have to mention that her current "DS" she thinks she owns is an old TI-85 calculator. She is SOOO proud carrying that thing around like it's the hottest thing in electronics. :)

Cracked me up that she kept calling these little diaries, DIARRHEAS. She said it over and over, and to anyone who asked what they were. SOOOO funny.

"mom, I am going to write that I am 6 in these diarrheas."

"No, Kaden, give me that diarrhea!"

"Awww...this is a cute diarrhea!"

Still laughing! :)

And probably the BEST and worst part of the night was when she was opening her last present. Jenny and Travis had been SO nice to pick out several little gifts for her, and as she opened their last one there was a visible change in her whole self...

I say the best and worst moment because looking back and seeing these pictures honestly makes me laugh....she was SOOOO dramatic about it...and considering that a Strawberry Shortcake doll had only been mentioned to me a few days before while browsing a toy store, I didn't know what the letdown was about.

I say worst because it was SO humiliating. Here I am thinking we are doing our best to teach our kids manners and how to handle things, and there she was showing me that I have no control over what she can use to embarrass the heck out of me! :)

She got over it soon--and moved on to practicing her photography techniques. :)

We missed Brandon being there...I missed him being there. If he had been, he could have shared in my humiliation...and the storebought cake, and the opening of the "diarrheas"...and he could have watched me sneak the sherbet right back into the fridge without serving it, after watching how insanely hyper the kiddos got after eating 2 bites of birthday cake....

Yep--it was a rowdy, crazy, 6 year old kind of family party. :)

Sweet 6....Happy Birthday Miss Jenna!

It is absolutely insane to think that 6 years ago, Jenna was born into our family...

And what's even more hard to wrap my mind around is that she went from this...

to this...

in the blink of an eye.

{what'd you say? You want to see more graduation pictures? Well, since you asked so nicely...}

Since Jenna won't be here for kindergarten graduation, they let me borrow a cap and gown to get some pictures of her. I just couldn't believe how grown up she looked...

On Saturday we had our little mommy/ daughter birthday date and went to use her little $3 gift certificate they send with the birthday club. She got a crown and balloon and was treated like ROYALTY there. She handles that treatment well, believe it or not. ;)

We had lunch together afterwards--I just loved watching her order her food and tell everyone it was going to be her birthday. This has been the year that the birthday has meant the most...boy has she been COUNTING DOWN. :)

It's me who would rather put the breaks on. 5 seemed like a safe year. 5 still felt young and carefree...

But 6...now 6 is different. 6 seems so much older, for whatever reason. Maybe because 6 leads to 7...and 7 just can't be for a long, long time.

And I find myself spinning around as I think back on the past years of her life...such good memories...rough times...funny times....HOW did all that time seem to pass so darn quick? It is a concept I will never completely understand.

How is it that this tiny little baby is born--they eat, sleep, poop, snuggle, cry...the basics of life, ya know? And yet within 6 short years that very same baby now eats, sleeps, poops, snuggles, cries, yells, laughs, runs, sings, writes, reads out loud, and dreams...she now is a leader, a helper, occasionally a conflict-causer, has her her own fashion style, her own opinions, and can be so incredibly stubborn one minute and the sweetest thing EVER the next. How is it that she has learned so much, grown so much, CHANGED so much in such a short amount of time?

It amazes me. It really, truly does.

And it amazes me even more that the speed with which such changes will occur will only increase from here on out.

I feel lucky to have the chance to raise her--and while I hope to heaven that I am not completely doing it wrong, I love how much I have learned from her in the process.

Jenna girl...I love you. Happy birthday...and may this magical age of 6 bring you all you are expecting it to--a loose tooth, a growth spurt, and 1 year closer to being able to pierce your ears. :)

I just can't leave that downer post on top!

It's a new day...a new week, really. And not that things are perfect, but they are better today. And better is a huge sigh of relief!

I am grateful to the people who helped me out today--watching the boys for a couple hours while I went to doctor appointments. IT WAS A HUGE help--and it really helped me not feel so alone in everything I am trying to do. So thank you--thank you sooo much to those who helped out.

Everything is on track according to the doctor--baby sounded good. I did, however, gain 3 pounds this month--which is a bit discouraging. I know the baby grows faster at this point, but I wish I could point it all to that. Instead I am cursing the frozen chunks of cookie dough I ate this past week while trying to comfort my depressed little self. However, total weight gain to date is 14 pounds--just hoping I can keep it under control for the next 7 weeks...

Ya...7 weeks. Can you believe that's all I have left? I can't. whew. FLYING by.

And for my peace of mind, the doctor had me go for an ultrasound before I take off to fly across the country for the month. Jenna got to go with me, and she thought it was pretty cool. I am glad to see for myself that things look good and are as well as can be expected. It's DEFINITELY a boy (ever heard the turtle analogy? I hadn't...picture a shell with the turtle sticking his head out...as boy parts. Ya...that threw me off! :) But now we are good to go and are ready to get myself and the kids packed and on a plane and head back West. We fly out in a week...and COUNTING down! :) So excited...

So not too much in the way of news...except that today it's all pretty good. Which I suppose comparing to last week, IS big news itself. :)

Am grateful for better days...I was definitely ready for one.

It's like being kicked when you're down.

There are times in life that....well....stink. Big time.

This week has DEFINITELY been on that list. I know I probably sound like a whiner...but at this point in the game, my emotions are running high and I can hardly think of a way to sugar coat things.

After our rough start to the week, we had one semi-mellow day in which things seemed to be looking up. I had a renewed optimism and was picking myself up, ready to face the big bad world again...

And then life struck again...

This includes but is not limited to:

--our basement flooding again. While not even close to as bad as previous times, it was still a BIG mess to clean up...physically and emotionally draining.

--Sheer exhaustion. The late nights and early mornings are sooooo not my thing. I have GOT to sleep well tonight or I am not sure if I will be a functioning human being tomorrow...

--Me backing into another car--which now means a hit on my insurance and a deductible to be met. I get that nobody was hurt...I'm glad. I get that it was small on both our cars...but it will still cost money to repair. Money, money, money that we don't have. Jenna told Brandon on the phone tonight that I cried a hundred times about it. She was pretty much correct.

Those are the big things really...the small things added up quickly too though...and it made me one big emotional mess.

It's just like being kicked while you're down...

I need to catch a break now...seriously. And as much as I would like to believe that things can only go up from here, I am starting to think this is only the beginning.

I think the most frustrating thing is that I am trying so hard. I am trying to hold things together and keep life as normal for the kids as possible. And yet there is so little of "normal" for ME. I'm caught in the eye of the storm and I just wish I could find my way out and be on solid ground again.

And dang it, I am tired of crying all the time. :)

REBEL

Tonight I am playing the rebel role...

I am letting my dishes sit in the sink unwashed tonight.

I am going to sit...not sew, not clean, not do any multitasking. Just sit...

and watch a cheesy Hallmark movie, of course. :)

And I am going to eat popcorn...with EXTRA butter.

And I am going to enjoy every single second...

Because I haven't done this for a long, long time.

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A little pick me up...

To say that our week started off rough, is an understatement.

However, after yesterday's "incident", I came home and took a short nap--did the dishes, swept the floor, and the kids played nicely all afternoon. It was MUCH easier to look back and laugh at the events that had transpired...and to pick myself back up and start with a better attitude.

After getting the kids in bed, I sewed for a while. I am making matching outfits and hairbows for my nieces (and Jenna) who will also be coming to Idaho to visit when we are there, and am finally starting to get projects complete. So, for my sister to see the final product...


My niece Emma is the same age as Kaden, within a couple weeks of each other--and he was my only available model today. It took some coaxing...I had to promise a couple cookies to get him to put this on. :) I had originally been only going to post the bottom half, but his full picture made me laugh.

Now on to finish the other outfits before we leave!
It just so happens that as I was uploading these pictures, I realized I had some others that were waiting on my memory card...

This is Jenna's EARTH DAY project--she had to make something out of recycled items, and Brandon helped her with this over the weekend. She was SO proud of "Roxy the Recycled Rockstar".

AND we got to try out my new waffle maker this week. The waffles turned out PERFECT--and it was so much fun to use. LOVE IT! :)

Made pasta for dinner last night, which in the kids minds makes you a GODDESS, got a decent night of sleep last night...and tomorrow is Friday. And ya know, the world just looks a little brighter today. :)

Nightmares...real ones and real life ones

Last night I woke up after having a nightmare that the boys had gotten a hold of the hair clippers and buzzed weird lines through their hair. It was one of those REAL dreams that make you wonder if it really happened.

I was awake most of the night after that--only to catch a final hour and a half of zzzz's before hearing little voices at 6:30 a.m.

Wednesdays are our busy day...so we did our normal routine. Hurry, hurry, hurry, get everyone dressed and ready, breakfast, pack Jenna lunch, leave the house to get Jenna to school early, and then race through rush hour traffic to downtown to get the boys to speech therapy.

We were about a mile away, on a street with nowhere to stop, when I hear Spencer panic in the backseat--I look at him in the rearview mirror and see he is doing "the potty dance" as best he can under the constraints of the buckles holding him back. I reassured him we were almost there, and I drove as fast as I could possible go...

He cried and cried and just as we were turning into the parking lot, it all stopped...and I knew what we were facing.

WET PANTS.

I didn't know what to do...I froze. See, most people would have a change of clothes in hand. But no, not me. He NEVER has an accident on the way there--since we do potty breaks before we leave the house and as soon as we get there. It just wasn't on the radar for me...

I walked the boys both into the building--mortified--and realize I have no other choice than to cancel their appointments and go back home. As I walk up to the desk to tell them, I broke down and started sobbing...

who cries about wet pants, dang it!? Oh ya, a severely sleep deprived pregnant woman. :)

I could tell that Spencer had to go AGAIN (seriously, 10 minutes later) so we made a stop to the bathroom while the staff tried to find him some spare clothes.

Kaden did his business, and then stood by, ready to flush the toilet. Spencer positioned himself and then let it loose...literally.

It was a real life nightmare...me, standing there with mascara running down my face, realizing that Spencer is not getting a single drop of pee in the toilet, but rather that he is forcefully spraying KADEN all over. I heard Kaden screaming, and my tears kept coming, but there was nothing I could to to fix the situation.

I am sure someday this will be really, really funny.

But today it didn't feel that way. It was like being in a nightmare that you can't escape. :) And it made my already tired eyes even more tired. Crying always does that, darn it!

It all started by praying for patience...

I decided that I really was up to going gung-ho on the whole patience is a virtue thing...really wanted to do my best and be a better mom and such...

So I prayed for extra patience today.

And all I got were a whole lot of opportunities to try that patience.

It stunk.

BIG TIME.

It was seriously one of the most challenging days I have had in a long time...and it's hard to think back to where it spiraled out of control.

Was it when Kaden decided to clean his Leap pad by running it under the water in the bathroom? Was it when I attempted to take the boys to ONE STORE to exchange a shirt that had randomly ended up shredded after washing it the first time? Was it when I realized that after emergency potty breaks (for these little boys), while trying to run my ONE errand, came closer together than the contractions of a woman in active labor?

Or maybe it was when I was completely ignored...all 3,789,241 times I tried to get any child to:

a) recognize I was calling their name

b) listen to directions

c) follow said directions

COMPLETELY IGNORED.

Seriously contemplated taking them all in for a hearing test.

Oh how this list could go on and on...

Point is...I will never, ever, ever pray for patience, ever again.

Tomorrow I will just pray that I will be able to make it through the day.

Last week in pictures...

For whatever reason, I thought that when Brandon left I would have all sorts of time to blog and just do whatever I wanted.

But no...this has not been the case. I can't even pinpoint why...it just hasn't.

So, better late than never...here is our last week in pics...and a brief recap...

Jenna had a friend from school over to play--My main thought that day was...

"can we PLEEEEEASE have playdates every day?! "

The kids were thrilled, all occupied and happy playing, and we had a great day!

We celebrated Cinco de Mayo...which really just translates into...

WE ATE REALLY DELICIOUS MEXICAN FOOD JUST BECAUSE... :)

Made everything from scratch...the enchiladas, the rice, the refried beans...mmm...

We met up with some friends and played at the park...

And then we celebrated Little Miss Grace's 1st birthday by having a tasty barbecue provided by Jenny and Travis...broke open a pinata...had yummy cake and icecream...fun night!

In short...I had the night off of cooking, and we all had a great time celebrating!

And on Friday, daddy came home!

I hadn't told the kids he would be coming, just in case something came up and he couldn't...didn't want to let them down. But he came through and was home before bedtime.

The kids were SO excited! I was so excited!

(please ignore the mess in the background of these pics...I know, I know...I needed to sweep and there are random things sitting around. sigh, don't ya hate when that happens?!)

I ran errands and did some shopping on Saturday...ALONE...and it was WONDERFUL. Brandon stayed home with the kids and helped Jenna with homework, and worked on some projects with the kids. Included in said projects was making "instruments" and practicing for a mother's day concert that they performed for me on Sunday morning.

IT. WAS. FUNNY.

The kids...all rocking out in their own way. Kaden on the "drums", Jenna on the "violin", and Spencer on the "guitar"...jamming out to their choice of Taylor Swift songs, "Romeo and Juliet".

We had a great weekend together. Everyone took naps on Sunday and we had a nice dinner with Jenny and Travis (and Grace), and then it came time to say goodbye...again...

I know I've said it before...but I have to say it again. It was so nice to have Brandon home this weekend. I know we won't see him again for a couple weeks--sigh--

I miss him. A lot. But we're doing our best to keep busy and help the days fly by...and counting the days till we get to all be together again!

472 shots later...Mother's Day picture

As insecure as I am about getting my picture taken, there is one time that I absolutely insist on...and that's mother's day. I have done this for several years now--and I love doing it and looking back on each year..

However, the older they get, the harder it gets...sounds backwards, right? You would think small ones would be harder to contain in one space and get to look at the camera. No. I am here to say that no...that is not true. Almost 500 attempts later...

I wish I could convey in one measly blog post how much this weekend meant to me. Having Brandon home was the ABSOLUTE best gift ever...my heart feels SO happy for all we got done this weekend, for all we DIDN'T get done...for the lazy Saturday spent together and watching him with the kids while building all sorts of projects with recyclable items. If there were a way to bottle up WONDERFUL, this weekend would be the first ingredient.

This is not to say that every mother's day has been this way...TRUST ME, there have been more "special days" filled with fighting and messes and illness and such...but this weekend...this mother's day was really, really great.

I am grateful to my kids...who teach me so much. I am blessed to watch them grow and develop their own little personalities...

I am grateful for my husband...who truly goes above and beyond to sacrifice for our family. I love him dearly.

And I am grateful for my own mom...and the mothers in my life and their examples...I am honored to have so many wonderful woman to look up to.

Happy mother's day...

FrIdAy TiDbItS

...IT'S BEEN A LONG DAY.

Not a bad one. Just a long one.

I had the most terrible pre-labor pains I have EVER experienced. Seriously I laid on the couch and cried most of the afternoon. IT. WAS. TERRIBLE.

...am doing a little better now. Just ready for the day to be over and the kids to be in bed and me to soak in the LONGEST, hottest bubble bath that is possible. Would prefer if it were in a bathtub other than my own, but hey, I will take what I can get.

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The kids are sitting down to leftovers tonight. (cheers). I however, am hoping I can think of something that sounds really delicious to me, that ISN'T leftovers. :) Even if it means I wait until they are in bed to have my meal.

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Jenna is a COMPLETE and total packrat. Like, seriously if there were a program for school age hoarders, she would be in it. (jeers) But today I put an end to the madness. (at least for another week...right?) I threw away every single little paper and trinket and piece of JUNK she had stored away. It looks so much better...for now. I can't wait for summer to begin, and the endless flow of school paperwork and projects and such to STOP.

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I packed a suitcase of clothes to take to my sister when we go to Idaho, full of Jenna's hand-me-downs. Gosh it's depressing to think of how much you spend on a child's wardrobe, only to pass it on to someone else. (and we're CHEAPOS here)...sooo depressing. It's hard to feel like we can splurge on all things girly when I know they will only be used by her...(at least in our immediate family)...instead I find we try to buy a lot of gender neutral where we can. And really, how much fun is THAT? Ya, it's not...

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I wish I had more hours in a day. Or more energy to do more in those hours in the day. The sewing projects I want to get to...the organizing I long to do...the projects I want to build or refinish...gosh, the list goes on. There are just never enough hours in the day...never.

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I hate Play-Doh. HATE IT. I hate that the kids get it out and ball it up in a million pieces and carry it around like it's their "little buddy". I have found dry doh in more places than I care to recount. Maybe it's because I am tired and feeling frazzled today, but at this point, I could care less if I never see another container in our house EVER AGAIN.

...I know, I know...I will change my mind on a better day.

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Today there was sunshine. That's just always a good thing.

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I have a roof over my head, and a car to drive, and family who care about us...that's a good feeling.

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And did I mention that BRANDON GETS TO COME HOME THIS WEEKEND!?!?!?

Yep..he does. A short couple days, but we can't wait!

....and there ya have our Friday tidbits... :)

Small successes

It's been 3 whole days since Brandon left.

And quite honestly, it's hard to believe that time has flown by like it has.

In a sense, it seems I have had the past couple days to learn things about me...about who I am as a mother and person in general. I know this concept probably sounds strange...but it's just that feeling I have.

I've been reading through Sister Hinckley's book "Small and Simple Things" and have been so touched by so many of the things she said. It has really given me a chance to reflect on my life--and where I want to be.

As I have thought about how things have gone thus far, I have thought back to Brandon's voice telling me to recognize my limits...and I feel like I really have. We have somehow been able to maintain some sense of organized life here. And while there are so many things on the TO DO list, I have just had to let some of them go for a day or two...My bedroom could really use a good cleaning, the kids sheets need changed, my kitchen floor desperately needs mopped...

But I have had small successes...my laundry is all caught up, my kitchen floor is SWEPT every day, my dishes are all done, and the living room is clean. But there comes a time of the day that I call mine. I have made bows, edited pictures, read...just something for me...without feeling guilty having all the to-do's hanging over me.

But more important, the kids seem to just be going with the flow. We have our schedule every night......dinner, bath, stories, scriptures, prayer, brush teeth, bed. It's all the same as it was before, except that we throw in a phone call to daddy. I have been SO GRATEFUL for the kids, because the most important parts of our day, they make SURE I do not forget. They wouldn't LET me forget that Monday night was family night...they get the scriptures out and ready to go when it's time...and honestly, it makes my heart feel TRULY happy that they are keeping me going in so many ways.

One of the things Sister Hinckley said in her book was, "We each to the best we can. My best may not be as good as your best, but it's my best. The fact is that we know when we are doing our best and when we are not. If we are not doing our best, it leaves us with a gnawing hunger and frustration. But when we do our level best, we experience a peace."

Oh how I have felt this peace--

Even though I know my best may not equal what many other can call their best...I am not superwoman...I cannot try to pretend I am. But I have felt good every night about doing what I should...what I could...

And tonight, I am just grateful for those small successes we've had...and for prayer...and for a Heavenly Father who I know is absolutely carrying our family through right now.

Tonight I feel blessed.

How many kisses do you want tonight?

Tonight Spencer chose the book "How Many Kisses Do You Want Tonight?" for me to read. We read it...making our way through the numbers...1,2,3,4,....hundreds, millions... :) At the end of the book I asked the kids, "how many kisses do YOU want tonight"?

I was met with numerous responses, which were promptly fulfilled...

...and then it became one great big kissing fest.

I had kids climbing all over me trying to kiss me anywhere the others hadn't already smothered me...we were smooching and counting and laughing so hard.

I could not help but think, that in that very moment, 100% pure happiness was being felt...by all of us.

I kept feeling like THIS is why having long days and struggling through SO MANY THINGS and

being a mom is WORTH IT!

This very thing...kisses, and hugs, and love--unconditional love, in those special moments in time, from precious little ones.

Playdates and cupcakes

I'm finally getting around to posting about our super fun Friday--as in LAST Friday...

It was a GORGEOUS day, and Jenna was out of school, so we decided to seize the opportunity to hit up one of our favorite parks! IT'S HUGE, and has something for everyone...lots of houses to play in, places to make believe, sandboxes to dig in, structures to climb...there's lots of swingin' and slidin' and having fun.

Pictures are pretty self-explanatory...just playing at the park. :)

After our park playin' we had a picnic lunch and then headed over to a cake shop I have been dying to go to! The White Flower Cake Shoppe has been on Food Network challenges several times (which were really cool to watch in the first place) and knowing it was close by, made me want to scope it out for myself. :)

Check out this work...AMAZING... (and the burger cake was LARGE!)

Are you drooling yet???

mmmm....

We picked the carrot cupcake and an oreo cupcake and the kids and I split them--they were sure tasty! As luck would have it, this cake boutique was in a REALLY fancy upscale shopping center, so a group of us trickling in with multiple small children was quite the sight.

The mess left at the table afterwards, and the fingerprints smeared all over the Omaha Steak glass door and escalator entrance were mortifying...

But the cupcakes...oh the cupcakes...were delicious.