The boys' bedroom--baseball style

Aaaaaaand we're moving on to the bedroom that Kaden and Spencer share. The house had a baseball fan in it when we bought it, and we decided to just go with it and decorate around that theme. There is still stuff to do in this room, but it's coming along. :)
We painted in here (it was a rather..."electric" blue before.)

Another view...


You may recognize these signs with their names...they used to have little cars where the baseballs are. We just switched them out. The dresser was one we've had for YEARS--and my parents had it for YEARS before that. So I did a coat of spray paint and we put new hardware on.


Their bunkbed was a Craigslist find--and I have to say, I do love it. We ended up having to block off the drawers (because no matter how we configured the bed, the ladder put a kid climbing up right under the ceiling fan.) But it's okay for now...


The ceiling fan we based the room around. :) I know, kind of silly to do I suppose. But hey, it was already here and we were being resourceful, right?




All the kids have rain gutter bookshelves with some bedtime reads...


View facing the closet (which is rather large and I always feel guilty for not using all of the space!)


And here is my secret project I worked on for a while! I had this idea that I wanted to slice a baseball bat in half and put pegs in to hang the boys' baseball hats on. I had searched and not found anything used--but since I really didn't want to spend too much, I held off. I happened to walk into a thrift store several weeks later and asked if they had any baseball bats. The lady walked over and shuffled through things and said, "well, we only have this"...

NO KIDDING...it was almost exactly the thing I had pictured in my mind.

IT WAS DESTINY. :) (and a HUGE blessing!) BONUS was that it only cost me $1.00.



HOWEVER, it blended too closely with the paint color...so my brain went to work...and came across this cabinet door at the Re-store...also $1.00


A little paint and sanding...and VOILA!



I am planning on doing either paint or vinyl of the red baseball stitching going behind the bat, just to add some color. And even though the cabinet door is a LITTLE bit bigger than I hoped, it was cheap and worked OKAY...so it's one of those things I will just deal with. :)

There ya have it. It's a simple room...and still needs a few finishing touches...but I'd say it's coming along!

The house tour continues...Our playroom

The ironic thing about posting all these house pictures is that I was mainly doing it to show my mom, FINALLY, and yet it turns out she has company and hasn't seen any of this thus far anyway! lol
Go figure... :)

So, the next room. Our playroom, just off the kitchen. Still a lot to change and rearrange. We have actually changed this room several times already. If you've been to my house at some point, you'll probably be surprised at how it looks now, because it's gone through a variety of different setups. :) But we're closing in on what I really wanted in the first place.

Still need to pain...planning on doing a quote of some kind in vinyl on the wall. If you remember from our Christmas pictures (which I am sure you probably don't!) we had the 8 shelf unit laying horizontally with the 2 skinny shelves on either side. But Brandon tossed out the idea of laying one skinny one down and having extra seating--and I've got to say I liked it (even though having the side shelves not the same height gets on my nerves). The kids love sitting up there--and it's nice to have a place that isn't the floor for adults. We will probably end up buying another skinny shelf to put on the right side of the bench and put the 8 cubby unit elsewhere in the room (will show ya in a minute). So it will probably end up being a big U shape and I will make a bench cushion with cute pillows...we shall see.

Follow??

Also...Carpet will be outta here as well.




The kids love this little table, but I don't know that we will keep it around for much longer...


On the opposite wall...our fireplace turned bookcase. :)

When we moved in, we brought our old home computer with the intention of using it for the kids. But we don't get consistent wireless internet in the back part of the house, so it's useless for what we intended. HUGE bummer. The desk and computer will be sold here in the next little bit...and we will put the 8 cubby shelf from the other wall, in this spot. It is a perfect fit and will be used to put our games and non storage bin items that I want to keep hidden from general view.


Also have plans to change out these vertical blinds. {shudder} I am going to put a cornice board up above (wood with trim to match the fireplace) and am planning to put up a curtain instead--using the technique I found here.


So that's that. :)Still trying to figure out what theme I want to go with--colors and such. I am SO very indecisive right now. Just feeling like I need to pick something and run with it. :)

That, or I need someone who loves all things decorating to come stay with me for the week so we can put our brains together and make this room something magical...
 :)

Master Bathroom, before and...Now.

Day 2--on our little house tour.
Ahhh...the bathroom. This room was one of our FIRST projects to tackle...and yet, we are STILL not done. But here is the progress thus far...

The before BEFORE picture...this was actually how the previous homeowners had it.

This picture is when we closed on the house. Simple. Plain. Ready for change. :)
Can I tell you how much that towel bar above the bathtub drove me NUTS!?
It looked off centered--and hung too low.
We also ditched the second mirror (above the toilet).

The debate between paint...
Notice our poor bathroom floors.
Previous homeowners had rubber backed bathmats...which = yellow staining on our flooring. This was something we had not seen before we moved in, because it was obviously covered with bathmats.
Lots of them.
And lots of bathmats is just not our thing.
 We really debated and debated over what to do about it.

We painted...and the floors looked even more yellow and dirty.
PLUS we painted the cabinets as well...which didn't help the flooring one bit. :)

And we decided that the floor just had to be done. I had seen several people recommend a product called Novalis--a vinyl plank flooring that is peel & stick. Now, this took a lot of investigation and research to feel reassured that it would work. We have had peel & stick tiles in the places we rented before and it was a horrid experience. But after reading a few thousand INCREDIBLE reviews, we decided to go for it. It cost us less than $50 for all the materials to do our floor, and was SO well worth it. WE LOVE our floor--even months later, it has stayed waterproof and in place--

This project was a big deal to us. Our first big D.I.Y. We had to take out the toilet and re-install it...that was a first for both of us. We learned a lot! :)

I had these wall hangings in our bedroom in our last house, and Brandon really wanted to get rid of them. But after a coat of paint and they fit right in above our tub now...

Our other big D.I.Y. was framing out our builder grade mirror. I read tutorial after tutorial and everyone sounded like "GEE, IT'S THE EASIEST THING EVER! I did it alone during naptime and it was a cinch!"
I am here to tell you this is NOT true! At least not for us.
This entailed us putting one piece of trim up at a time. We had to tape it (with liquid nails on the back) and then stack a bunch of misc. items (hand weights, stir-fry sauce, and a big bucket of wheat) to get it to stay in place. We had to let each piece dry overnight. So this was a several day process to get it to go on straight.
WHEW. But we did it. And it looks SO nice!

AFTER: Or should I say {NOW, at our stopping point}

We changed out the faucets (those builder plastic handle faucets are GONE-ZO. HALLELUJAH!)

And they just so happen to match the light fixture (bought on clearance) we put in (took out the builder grade "Hollywood" lights that made me crazy!!) I am planning to put a towel bar on that wall. Can't decide if it should be a one towel bar, or one that will fit two towels. (that would take up most the wall space)

I was at Ross and found the wall hangings to the left. Thought it was SO awesome that they match the same pattern in the pieces above the tub.They were bronze or something. But I sprayed them white and it made all the difference!
(though, looking at it in the picture has me wondering if I went a little circle crazy...too much?)

(also put new hardware on the cabinets!)

STILL TO DO:

1.Put up crown molding...it's already purchased. We just don't have a nail gun...or any knowledge of how to put up crown molding.

2. find towels that will work in this room. See comment 4.

3. Hang the towel bar.

4. Repaint. Yes. repaint. It took me a while to adjust to this color--it is something I never have done before and it felt really good to "live on the edge", so to speak. There are a couple reasons I think the paint will end up changing...I am having an IMPOSSIBLE time finding an accent color (was hoping for a buttery yellow) that works in here. It's either so light it looks cream, or too bright and makes the walls look green. It's weird...Also, I had plans to paint our bedroom a lighter gray and carry over the same type colors, with butter yellow accents. HOWEVER, I realized that it would look pretty awful with our builder grade beige carpet...

So, if I want to have the bedroom coordinate with the bathroom, the gray has to go. It may be a while (it was TEDIOUS to paint in there) but I think it will be painted back to a different color--sigh.

Ya with me still?? :)

At any rate...That's the bathroom. That's the progress. We really have done a lot, and I love the changes we've made. But it will feel SO good to be D.O.N.E....if that day EVER comes. :)

7 months later...FINALLY some pictures of our house.

I realized today that we officially closed on our house 7 months ago.

7 MONTHS. It's a HOUSEAVERSARY of sorts... :)

And I have not posted pictures of our living space since then, despite the numerous requests. (mainly from my mom...) :)

So here mom...and the 3 other people who may be interested in this...Thought I would take the next few days and post pictures of different rooms. I had been waiting to have everything in and perfect before I posted...but I finally realized that we are a long way from that...thanks to busy, busy schedules and indecisive paint-choosing skills. :) And quite honestly, there may never be a PERFECT. So here it is...imperfections and all. Our humble little first home...

Please note...we are undergoing operation No Wall Left Behind, in an effort to assure that the only white we have is in our trimwork. :) So, there are a lot of paint decisions to be made...tough stuff because our house goes back and connects 3 rooms--meaning the paint really has to coordinate really well in the main area. Tough stuff we're dealing with I tell ya! :) Input welcome!



From the front door looking back (ignore the yellow lighting...who knows why it picked it up that way!)


The back half of our living room (where we have our computer armoire) Chair in the corner still needs to be redone...



Looking towards the front of the house.


Looking forward again--different angle.


Picture wall in the works...well, at least THOUGHTS of a picture wall are in the works. :)


From front entry--the carpet is on it's way out soon! Just waiting for a tax return and a few days off!



KITCHEN.
(for those of you who've been in on my paint dilema...feel free to weigh in here as to what color we should use in the kitchen! )


Lots of painting to be done. :) LOTS. Brandon is head over heels excited about this...let me tell ya!








LOVE leaving my Bosch mixer out. I'd say I am generally a counter minimalist, but I ADORE the fact that I can leave my mixer out since I use it almost daily! It stays hidden from direct view, but accessible. LOVE.


One thing I LOVE is my pantry. For those of you who have huge walk-in spaces and such, just know that before this house, we had to go downstairs for ANY food that wasn't in the fridge. So this is AMAAAAAZING to me and I love all the space I have!


Behind the pantry door--lunchbox station and plastic baggie dispenser. :)


You can see pics from move-in day here: http://brholloway.blogspot.com/2011/05/were-here-kind-of-pics-of-our-new-house.html

So there ya have it. Happy 7 months...and hooray for FINALLY posting a few pics. Be on the lookout for more to come. Not perfect, but posted anyway. :)

If you give a tired mom a no-bake cookie...

'

Image found here

It all started out, an idea online...

to make no-bake cookies, a favorite of mine.

A drop of chocolate goodness, with PB galore

is a little piece of heaven, need I say more?

I only ate one cookie, (well, one and a third)

And told myself "DONE"...it's a powerful word.

The next morning I woke after too few hours of sleep,

hoping to calm baby cries, and silence to keep.

I held him close against me, through the kitchen we paced,

when I spotted those cookies, and just HAD to have a taste.

I took one tiny piece off... it melted in my mouth.

Carter caught a glimpse of this, and that's when things went south.

The was weeping and wailing and a fit like no other, 

That boy loves his no-bakes...just as much as his mother.

So at 5 a.m. on a stormy, dark day,

We were sitting in the kitchen just munching away...

It didn't stop there, for every time I passed by,

I would stealthily sneak cookies like an underground spy!

GUILT spoke, "DON'T DO IT, you've worked hard till now!"
But my motivation and willpower had vanished somehow.

A few hours later I was starting to see,

that half the cookies were GONE, thanks to little ol' me.

But it wasn't just the cookies I inhaled that day...

it was anything and everything that got in my way.

Swedish meatballs for breakfast, swedish meatballs for lunch,

And a few handfuls of chips for a salty, crisp crunch.

And so could end my meal with a sweet taste instead,

I slathered strawberry jam on a homemade piece of bread.

And when I was done, I sat down on the floor

And promised myself a day like this was NO MORE.

We all have these days, right? I'D REALLY LIKE TO THINK...

where it's everything you can do to not eat the kitchen sink!

I'm armed with veggies and fruit, and a new vow to eat right!!

WAIT! Ice cream in the freezer? Okay...just one little bite. :)

A little pre-church photo-op

Carter got dressed up in his cute suit for church on Sunday...and he looked so darn adorable I just HAD to snap a picture or two. Unfortunately, he had other ideas...

Somewhere in our laughter, Brandon copied him, and our little "photo shoot" was born. The kids were SO excited--begging, begging, begging to get their pictures.

Tried to get Brandon solo in this one, but Kaden wouldn't let him be. HAD to get his silly face in. :)

Then they all jumped in get one with daddy...and despite Kaden's crazy face (yet again) I think it turned out pretty cute. :)

Rock-a-bye baby...

My Sweet Jenna,

For a couple weeks now you have been on a quest to be a bedtime helper and rock Carter to sleep.

I found you in the room with him silently sitting on your lap while you sang him every song you knew. The lights were out and it was so precious to watch you both sit in the rocking chair and just snuggle.

Carter is a chunky little guy--weighing only 12 pounds less than you. So his chubby body almost dwarfs your petite frame. But you have been insistent, putting him on your lap and singing to him almost every night since.

I love it. And he loves it. And I love that YOU love it.

Thank you for sharing your precious snuggles--Carter's a lucky little guy to have a sister like you.

Love, mom

Figuring it all out...

After my first full night of sleep in about 2-3 months, I was able to step back and see things a little more clear.

As I look at things, I can pinpoint why I felt the way I did the other day.
I would say the number one factor of my loneliness is that my contact with my local world is almost
 non-existent.

While people are off having playgroups and such, I am home with a napping baby...

who still hasn't given up the twice daily sleep times.

There aren't really girl's nights or evening get-togethers, at least that I know of...and if there are, it is always planned on a night that Brandon is gone. ALWAYS works out that way! 

So my evening time is often spent running errands or grocery shopping alone .

And afternoons are busy--we get home at almost 4 p.m...and then we have homework and dinner and getting people settled after school, so there is little time for afternoon social time.
It  is just a busy, busy time.

And I am sure things will change, at some point. But for now, the interaction I have with the outside world feels SO minimal. And if you know me...REALLY know me...you would know that I love to be a social person. So being here, in this state of life I am in, feels like I am missing a piece of me. 

And of course I feel lonely because of that! 

 I find now, that when there ARE group activities I am able to attend, I feel awkward and out of place...
I do and say all the wrong things...

and everyone has established their friendships--while I was sitting home during naptime, or picking up kids from school. So the social person I feel inside, just takes a back seat, trying to figure out where or how
 I fit in this scene.

I can also blame my meltdown on the major lack of sleep lately...

Just have had issues with all of the kids at some point--either waking incredibly early or up multiple times a night due to multiple ear infections and illnesses. Lack of sleep = emotional instability. True story. :)

Guess what I am saying is that while I am certain there are many who read my occasional breakdown posts and gasp in horror that I would share something like that publicly, I just have to be me...
and the me I know shares the good and the bad...
because I needed to feel heard.
That in the black hole of my life that day, I had a voice...even if only a small one.

We had the missionaries for dinner last night. One of them shared a thought and said something to the effect of "you can't be an experienced sailor unless you know how to sail rough seas".
BAM.
Hit me right to the core.
That everyone has a different difficulties.
Some will struggle with loneliness. Some will struggle with infertility. Some will struggle with depression. Some will struggle with anxiety and insecurities. Some will struggle in their marriages. Some will struggle with colicky babies, or defiant children. Some will struggle with all of the above...at different times, or all at once.
But it is each struggle and difficulty that gives us the experience and skills necessary to keep our ship afloat in the inevitable rough waters.

And maybe these struggles and difficult times, that make me feel and look weak,
are really just helping me be the best captain I can...
at least I hope so.

Feeling

If someone were to ask, I'd say I was an avid blogger.
But lately it feels as though I should say, I WAS an avid blogger.

I think what it ultimately comes down to is FEELING.
Feeling a lot of things I know don't make sense to anyone else.
Feeling an incredible amount of lonliness.
Feeling stressed and overwhelmed at times.
Feeling like I want to just disappear sometimes.
Feeling like it wouldn't matter...to anyone.
Feeling like I don't have anything to contribute...

And yet, I have moments of happiness...
Feeling blessed to be at this time in my life and triumphant having gone through all we've been through the past several years.
Feeling happy as I watch my children when they play nicely together.
Feeling lucky that I married the man I did.

And then it hits--BAM. The black void.

I laid in bed the other day, around 4 a.m., just bawling.
It wasn't about something someone did or said. It was just that I was so FULL and yet SO EMPTY at the same time.

And I know, from the outside looking in, it's an easy fix. Focus on the positive! Count your blessings, etc.

But for today--I just needed to curl up in bed and cry.
And so I did.

I cried because it was a morning gone wrong. I had to deal with someone who brings out my most insecure side. I couldn't focus. I did things wrong. We were rushed. It was busy...and hectic...

But most of all I cried because this morning, we passed a terrible school bus accident. It was full of children who attend the same school as MY children. And it was so fresh that no emergency crew were on the scene. It was chaos. Kids crying, a crumpled bus on it's side. A driver trapped inside. There were books and papers and backpacks strewn about.

The scene has been etched in my mind. I could not shake the image...hard as I tried. I feel blessed it wasn't my children on the bus. True. But I can't help but wonder the what if's...
What IF I had been driving there 2 minutes earlier? What if Spencer hadn't left his backpack inside the house...AGAIN..after being reminded time and time again? What if I hadn't spent the little bit of time searching through my bag for an important number that went missing on our way to school? What if there had been less traffic on the highway?

In the dense fog we had this morning, it very well could have been our car mangled on the side of the road.

And while it wasn't, I just keep playing the events of this morning. I was rushed. It's my day to lead my Weight Watchers meeting, and my receptionist had asked for a ride. So our morning schedule was out of sorts. Our timing totally off. And in my sleep-deprived, exhausted state I was not the most pleasant person this morning as I rushed the kids to hurry and get ready so we could go, go, go.

Just 2 minutes earlier.

So on this day, when I feel alone and lost and somwhat abandoned...there is also a FEELING that even if just for today, God was watching over us. Protecting us. And while the situation with the children on the bus is very, very tragic to me still, I can't help but think the damage that would have been done had the big Lowe's delivery truck plowed into a small car or van instead of a large metal bus...

It may not make much sense...any of this, to anyone else.
But it is raw and real...and very much the way I feel.
Today.

The new norm...

CHANGE.

We've had a lot.

And yet, it's often hard to identify exactly what sometimes because life has a way of somehow taking what comes and fitting it in or tossing it out.

But lately it feels we have a new norm around here...

Christmas break is over.

We're back to school...and schedules...and driving every which way.

Carter has not slept well.

My new morning norm is somewhere in the 4 a.m. hour.

every day.

Which means exhaustion is also in my everyday norm now too.

Bike riding has become the norm...

the kids love, love, love their bikes.

Afternoon parades around the block...

and many, many smiles.

Kaden has had some hearing loss the past few months and we were finally able to get him in to see a Dr. Miraculously they got him in to get tubes not even a week later.

So a little boy with a new set of ears, so to speak...

that's the new norm.

And the other day I realized, that somewhere along the line

Spencer stopped sucking his thumb.

I'm not sure when, or how we did that one...

but it too has become just a part of life. ;)

I've officially started leading Weight Watcher meetings at my local center.

I am really excited about this--and hope I can really work hard to do better and better each meeting.

I am still adjusting to several aspects of being a leader...

but really can see how it will be a good "norm" once I settle in with everything.

One of the biggest changes in life right now is that my sister Abby has come to live with us for the next 3 1/2 months so she can work and earn money for next semester.

I'll be honest. I had moments of doubt before she came...would it be weird having someone else around? And the truth is, because of our age difference, I really don't KNOW my sister Abby the way I know some of my other siblings. I left home when she was about 4-5. And well, we all know that MOST of us aren't the same at 18 as we are in kindergarten. :)

 But she got here last week, and we've been taking things a day at a time...

but I'd say the new norm is pretty darn good.

The kids love having an aunt here, to play games and be fun--because that's one thing Abby does really well.

And I'm loving the chance to get to know WHO Abby is...

she surprises me daily with different things. I never knew she liked the game Risk, or that she was so involved in knowing about the Presidential debate, or that she is giving and compassionate enough to offer me a shoulder AND foot rub when she isn't feeling great herself. And I just love knowing these things...I love seeing her for who she is, and having these lightbulb moments of discovery.

It isn't everyone who gets this chance...to get to live with a sibling after their growing up years are through.

So I feel very, very lucky.

And very, very blessed to add her into our new, and ever-changing norm...

...till the next new norm... :)

Magid Shoe covers

Several weeks ago, I was approached by a company to do a product review. I've had several companies do this before, so it was nothing new. However, I never really bothered to check out what exactly the product is I would be reviewing...so I imagine my face looked very much like this...



 when a box full of these showed up on my doorstep...



Yes, my friends. As per the website, these covers are constructed with tear and puncture resistant spun bond polypropylene with elastic at the ankles. These protective covers are excellent for work in dirty areas.

• White
• Disposable
• Made with polypropylene
• Elastic at ankles

Upon further inspection, we also learned these are fantastic for skating across linoleum floors, and they even make great hats. :) One thing is for sure...they made us all laugh!

But kidding aside, as I tried to think of ways I would use these, I thought of several friends who are listing their homes for sale soon, and are worried about their floors getting dirty. These would be great to have for potential homebuyers to slip on, should they not want to remove their shoes (because let's face it...some people are weird about that!). And I'm seriously contemplating wearing these when I paint--because without fail, I ALWAYS manage to spill something on my shoes! It would even work when using spraypaint to keep your shoes (or toes...because I KNOW not everyone wears shoes while spraypainting. lol)

For more information on these ultra cool shoesavers--go here!